Moustache Hall of Fame
// Staches, the best of the best.
Keith Hernandez, Pro Baseball Player
Suave, sophisticated, and smoothe. Those are the best ways to describe Keith's moustache. Keith is also the first person in major league baseball history to have his moustache win a gold glove and hit for the cycle. A legendary man, with an even more legendary moustache.
Occupation: Sexy first basemen for the New York Mets
Achievements:
* Won 11 consecutive Gold Glove Awards (1978-1988) at first base (the largest total by any first baseman).
* Won 11 consecutive Gold Glove Awards (1978-1988) at first base (the largest total by any first baseman).
* Won the 1979 National League MVP award along with Willie Stargell.
* Was selected to the All-Star Game five times (1979, 1980, 1984, 1986 as a starter, and 1987).
* Voted best mustache of all New York Mets
Headlines:
Bernie Mac passes away at age 50. In a related story, Sinbad is, in fact, still alive.
Stockton, California to be destroyed for its own good. California law-makers ask: What took so long?
Detroit Mayor arrested. Wanted to "connect more with the community."
Arkansas town creates 24-hour curfew to deal with crime. In a related story, Oakland, CA to be made into it's own island.
Sporting News:
Brett Favre is traded from the Packers to the Jets. What do the Packers and Jets have in common? Equally annoying fans.
Athlete says sports steroids changed him from woman to man, which begs the question: Is Chyna on steroids?
Officials deem 2008 Special Olympics "hilarious."
Kobe Bryant wins a gold medal in the "underaged breast stroke."
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